
October 5, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
- A RAY OF HOPE -
It was a soothing drive home. The sun was retreating and the sky was painted an orange glow. The meeting left John feeling motivated and hopeful. He hadn’t expected to come away with such a positive and clear picture of their situation, not to mention a plain understanding of what to do from here. It was odd, he thought. He hadn’t felt this optimistic in quite some time.
Lisa sat beside him watching the trees rush by. Her thoughts went back to the meeting. It was amazing how there was actually a ray of hope in their situation. The mere thought was inspiring! Maybe no one would have to find out how close they were to not getting the house. Good thing she hadn’t told her mother about their problems yet.
“That was a great meeting,” Lisa remarked as they pulled up to the apartment.
“Yeah,” said John. He looked at the papers and what they had written on them. “This method Rob has showed us, it’s brilliant! Yet if you really think about it, it’s really very simple.”
“What I love about it is realizing that our problem is more common than we thought. It seems he’s handled plenty of problems like ours just by using The Master Method!”
- IT’S A DATE -
At work the following day, John went to find Sarah. He peeked around the corner of her office and found her sitting at her desk.
“Hi, Sarah!”
“Hey John, how’s it going?”
“Good. We talked with Rob last night and told him all about our problem with the house plans. He worked with us to figure out a plan. It went great!” said John enthusiastically. “I want to thank you for pointing us in the right direction. We’ve been motivated by Rob and The Master Method.”
“Oh, no problem! I want to tell everyone about this method he’s shown us. He’s also the best builder I know, easy to work with, and the timber framing they do is amazing. Arthur and I both love the house they built for us!” Sarah smiled.
“You certainly do have a very nice home. Timber framing adds so much to any house. Lisa and I are dead set on a timber framed home.”
“You’ll never regret it!” Lisa added.
“Well, I’ll see you at lunch.”
John left with a wave.
The rest of the day went great. John worked hard and felt enthused! On the way home he decided to make it a night out for Lisa and him. They hadn’t spent an evening out, just the two of them, in a long time. They could talk about their house plans that had been revived. He called Lisa and she agreed. She thought it would be nice to get out, too.
“There’s a place about 10 minutes away I’ve heard good things about,” John said.
“Sure!” said Lisa. “Surprise me!”
As they drove, John told Lisa about his day. “I talked to Sarah today and told her how much we enjoyed the meeting last night. She was pleased we went to see Rob. She and Arthur have been very happy with their house.”
“I’m glad she told you about him. He was very helpful and friendly. I especially appreciated the way he dealt with our problem. It helped me look at things in a different way.”
They arrived at the restaurant. They had arrived a little early for dinner so the place was less than half full. A young man showed them to a window seat with nice view and brought them some water.
“It’s been awhile since I’ve had seafood, or ate out at all, for that matter,” John mentioned as they looked over the menu.
“It’s been forever! I guess we’ve been too busy lately.” Lisa acknowledged.
“Yeah, too busy blaming each other instead of working together.”
She flashed him a somewhat guilty little smile. “So what sounds good?”
While they ate, they talked about many things but “the house” always seemed to come up again and again. They discussed the different styles of timber framing, colors, sizes, etc.
“…and we could have a timber-framed arch above a gate at the entrance, and a brick driveway instead of paved!” Lisa’s was more excited than she had been in days. “There’s just so much we can do!”
“Let’s find out what our limit is first. We wouldn’t want to overshoot our budget and be caught in a similar situation as Sarah and Arthur. We need to meet with Rob again to obtain a clear picture of what we can afford.”
“I know, but it’s just so fun to fantasize!” said Lisa.
John smiled, “Just try not to get your hopes too high. I’m scared to discuss the house plans too much until we know exactly what we can afford.”
“It’s fun to imagine, but I do know how you feel. I think we both do, especially after the disappointment we had last week.”
“Well, that’s behind us, let’s have a good time now. Let’s celebrate a brand new start!” exclaimed John.
When the check came, they were proud of themselves for not overspending. They both ate well, but neither ordered the most expensive thing on the menu – a first for Lisa. They had both thoroughly enjoyed their dinners and each other’s company.
“Where are we going now?” asked Lisa.
“The book store.”
“The book store?”
Why the book store…? Self-help books? Divorce made easy?
Read more tomorrow!
Mister P
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October 4, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
“I dunno,” replied John. “I think there are even more reasons. Maybe the core problem is, ‘Lack of discipline and planning.’”
“That sounds good,” Lisa replied, “but I think that the too much too soon needs to be included, too.”
“I think it’s covered in lack of discipline.”
“Maybe,” said Lisa, “but ‘Too much too soon’ sends me a clear message. What if we say lack of specific goals, discipline and planning?”
John nodded, wrote it down and placed it as a core complaint under the cash ratio note.
Here is what the new arrangement looked like:
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STRAINED MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP
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FAILURE TO QUALIFY FOR BANK LOAN
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JOHN BECOMING EASILY DEJECTED
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LISA NOT HAPPY WITH JOHN OR HERSELF
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LISA PERCEIVES THAT JOHN’S POOR ORGANIZATION IS A HUGE PROBLEM
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LACK OF SPECIFIC GOALS, DISCIPLINE AND PLANNING
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LISA’S MOTHER’S NEGATIVE OPINION
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INCOME STINKS
NEGATIVE INCOME TO EXPENSE RATIO
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“It’s making more sense,” he said “The lack of mutual articulated goals, discipline and planning throws our cash ratio out of kilter. That, in turn, reinforces Lisa’s view and her mother’s that I’m a loser, and that makes Lisa unhappy and makes me feel dejected. The core complaint directly relates to cash tied up in property, car repairs and zoning problems and all of that adds to more strain on our relationship.
“Both of us being unhappy adds to the core problem of articulate goals, discipline and planning, which creates a vicious cycle. Above that cycle, Lisa spends more as a result which gives us a bad credit score. Not to mention all the stuff we purchase on a buy now, pay later plan.”
“That’s probably why the bank turned us down,” Lisa admitted. “And everything leads to a deteriorating relationship, which makes me even more unhappy!”
“Well Rob,” John inquired, “How do we fix the core problem?”
“I have to say that you guys did a fabulous job!” Rob answered. “Now you have identified the weak link and you know where to focus your energies. You also know what you don’t want. This should assist you with step 3 when you set your goals.”
“I really have to get going, but use the guide I’ve given you to finish the formula. Call me when you need to and if I don’t hear from you in a few days, I’ll call to see how it’s going.”
“But wait! Can’t we just schedule another meeting like this one?” John stammered.
“We could, but it’s better for you both if you work through it yourselves. If you really get stumped, feel free to call me, but part of the benefit comes from you two working together. The other advantage is that you can start with 3, 4, and 5 immediately instead of waiting until next week to meet with me.”
“Well, you saying that gives me confidence to try,” said John.
“I’m sure we can do it!” exclaimed Lisa. “Thanks a million Rob.”
“Don’t mention it. Just keep me informed of your progress.”
John stood up. “Alright, we’ll be going. Thanks so much for your time.”
“You’re welcome and thanks for stopping by.”
Everyone exchanged smiles and handshakes and John and Lisa left feeling like a 20-ton boulder had just been lifted off their shoulders. They hadn’t really solved anything yet, but they both believed they just might have the tools now to do so.
Yes… how will they fix the core problem? Post your prediction!
Mister P
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October 2, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
“Rob answered, “Let’s take a look.”
Now the notes looked like this:
They read:
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STRAINED MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP
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FAILURE TO QUALIFY FOR BANK LOAN
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JOHN BECOMING EASILY DEJECTED
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LISA NOT HAPPY WITH JOHN OR HERSELF
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LISA PERCEIVES THAT JOHN’S POOR ORGANIZATION IS A HUGE PROBLEM
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INCOME STINKS
NEGATIVE INCOME TO EXPENSE RATIO
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LISA’S MOTHER’S NEGATIVE OPINION
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“It seems like Lisa is on the right track,” Rob observed. “Maybe you can take another look at the cause and effect relationship.”
John and Lisa started to slide the notes around excitedly. “This is starting to come together,” Lisa commented.
They looked like this:
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STRAINED MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP
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FAILURE TO QUALIFY FOR BANK LOAN
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JOHN BECOMING EASILY DEJECTED
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LISA NOT HAPPY WITH JOHN OR HERSELF
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LISA PERCEIVES THAT JOHN’S POOR ORGANIZATION IS A HUGE PROBLEM
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LISA’S MOTHER’S NEGATIVE OPINION
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INCOME STINKS
NEGATIVE INCOME TO EXPENSE RATIO
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“Well, we still don’t have a place for the zoning problem and we are missing a cause for the income/expense ratio,” Lisa stated.
“Could we put Lisa spending too much in two places?” John asked Rob, half joking. Lisa shot him a look that would have killed a lesser man.
Rob was noncommittal. “Whatever you think. Negative spirals are very common.”
Lisa grabbed a scrap paper and wrote Lisa is spending too much and placed it beneath the cash ratio complaint. She slammed the note on the table.
“I’m sorry,” John sputtered. “That can’t really be correct! There’s at least 3 reasons why we don’t have enough cash at the end of the month. The first is probably wanting too much too soon, the second is a lack of a budget or planning, and the third…well, I could be better organized and more valuable to my firm which would result in more money.”
“So how do we fit all that on a note?” Lisa asked.
More tomorrow…
Mister P
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October 1, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
“No, put it towards the top for now,” John replied as he took the next note. “Car needs repairs. Definitely at the top so far.” He placed the note on the table immediately.
Lisa already had the next note ready. “Zoning problem,” she said staring at the table. “Well, John? Where should I put this?”
“Set it above ‘Poor organization’ for now,” John answered, looking at the next note. “‘Black mark on our credit.’ That should go above Lisa’s spending because we couldn’t pay the Visa bill for a couple of months.”
“I suppose you’re right,” said Lisa, “but what about this one?” Lisa wasn’t feeling very happy with John or herself. “‘Failure to qualify for bank loan.’”
“I better let you place that one,” John said hastily.
They continued going through the little stack of notes until they looked like this:
They read:
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JOHN BECOMING EASILY DEJECTED
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LISA NOT HAPPY WITH JOHN OR HERSELF
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LISA’S MOTHER’S NEGATIVE OPINION
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“I think the bank loan comes after my tendency to become dejected, even though it makes me more depressed to think about it,” said John. “What’s next?”
“Strained marriage relationship,” read Lisa, raising her eyebrows and smirking. “Maybe we should discuss this one privately.”
“See if you can place it,” encouraged Rob. “Just don’t start playing the blame game.”
“I’ll defer to your judgment, Lisa.” John made a surrender motion with his arms and smiled. “Have at it.”
Lisa stared at the note and the table intermittently for a while. Finally she spoke. “After the relationship is strained, it feels as though it is the cause of the problems, but I believe it belongs on the top.” She set the note down. “We can always move it later.”
“This one is yours John, ‘Cash tied up in property.’” She handed John the card.
John put his chin on his hand, looking at the complaint. “Why did we put such a large down payment on the property? I guess it had felt so right. But where should we place it? It should have helped with the bank appraisal, the bank didn’t know about the wetlands glitch.
“Well, we’ll set it next to the wetlands problem for now,” he said, taking the last note. “This one is a beauty. ‘Income stinks.’ Obviously, I didn’t write that one. Where should we put it?”
“Well, I can’t answer that question,” answered Rob. “But I can say this complaint is awfully subjective. You know, there are a lot of couples that would be thrilled to have your income. It can be easy to complain too much.”
“So where do we put this?” John asked Lisa.
Lisa was staring at the complaint arrangement. “I don’t like how this is shaping up,” she said at last. “John’s poor organization is at the bottom of all this and that can’t be right!”
Rob spoke up, “You could be right Lisa. Sometimes a core complaint can be missing or just worded incorrectly. But let’s focus on the last note for now. Maybe there’s a more constructive way to phrase it. Why do you feel your income is a problem?”
John and Lisa looked at each other. John shrugged “I don’t know, I guess because there is never anything left at the end of the month and we want more.”
Lisa tapped her pen on the table. “Maybe we could say, ‘Negative income to expense ratio.’ How does that sound?” She looked at John and Rob.
“That’s another way to say it,” responded Rob.
“Sounds right to me,” added John.
“OK, so where does it go?” Lisa pondered it for a minute. “I almost think we should reword John’s poor organization and try reworking the cause and effect sequence. I mean, even if John’s strong point may not be organizing it can’t be the cause of all of our problems, right John?”
“Well, you wrote that complaint. Is it really fair, or is there something else that really bothers you?” John suggested.
Lisa nodded. “It does feel like all of my problems would go away if you were better organized, but that’s probably unrealistic.” She thought a bit. “What could I actually be trying to say?
“I guess what I really want is for you to take care of all my wants and desires. To be on the ball and be an infallible provider, almost as if you could read my mind. I’m sorry, John, I know that sounds like a spoiled child, but deep down that’s what I need emotionally.”
John looked bewildered, “Hey look, Lisa. I’m not a shrink and I’m not Superman. I’m just an average engineer alright?”
“I know, I really do. I know it’s totally unrealistic, but a woman wants to feel her man is taking care of her and I just don’t feel that with everything that’s been going on! Tell you what, let’s change it to ‘Lisa feels John’s poor organization is a big problem.”
John looked a bit less annoyed and said, “Fine. So, now what?” he asked Rob.
What will they do…? Post your prediction!
Mister P
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September 30, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
master method
A Dream-to-Reality Process
1) Write down any negative thoughts or complaints that you associate with your business on sticky notes (one complaint per note).
Minimum: 10 complaints!
2) Organize your complaints in relation to cause and effect (this will reveal the weak link in your plan and help you with the next step).
3) List your goals on notebook paper to address your complaints, as if you could wave a magic wand, a perfect world scenario (one goal per page).
4) Under each goal, skipping 4 or 5 lines, list all of the reasons your goal is unrealistic, a fool’s paradise, and completely unachievable.
5) Go back and solve your negative objections one by one, and watch the roadmap to reach your goals emerge!
This will not give you perfection, but it will give you impressive results by harnessing both positive and negative energy, and forcing you to challenge your obstacles.
“OK, so we’ve completed step one,” said Lisa,” How long does something like this take?”
“Depends on how complex your goal is and how much energy and focus you put into it,” Rob replied, “but you should be able to make good progress in a couple of hours.”
“Sooo… it says to organize your complaints by cause and effect… what does that mean exactly?”
You’ve got your complaints on sticky notes?” asked Rob.
“Yeah, here they are,” John said, placing the notes on the table.
“OK, let’s start Step 2. Take two of the notes and compare them,” said Rob. “Which of them comes first?”
John picked up two notes, reading, “OK, this one says ‘Lisa spends too much,’ and this one says, ‘John is becoming easily dejected.’ Well I get dejected when Lisa spends too much, so I would say that spending comes before dejected.”
“Not so fast,” Lisa interjected. “When you are down I buy stuff to cheer myself up, because you’re depressing to be around.”
John and Lisa both looked at Rob as if to say, “Now what?” Rob smiled.
“This happens all the time. That’s why we use a different note for each complaint. Set those two complaints down side by side and pick up the next complaint.”
John picked up the next note. “John’s poor organization,” he read. “This definitely is before the first two.”
“OK, put that one below the others. We want to build from the bottom up,” explained Rob.
The next note read. “Lisa’s mother hates John.”
Lisa defended her mother saying, “I really don’t think that’s relevant.”
“If it is a complaint, it is usually relevant,” confirmed Rob. “Just place the note where you think it goes. It can always be moved or taken out later.”
“Fine,” Lisa said, unenthused. “Well, I don’t think my mom has caused any disorganization on your part, do you John?”
To be continued…
Mister P
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September 29, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
- FIVE STEPS -
John left work early the next day. Since he had stayed so late the day before, no one questioned him about it. Besides, he had more than caught up on everything he could think of in his attempt to avoid going home. He picked up some Thai food on the way home so they could eat without delay. He got there early, so Lisa wasn’t home yet from her job as a primary school teacher. John ate quickly and was about to call her on her cell phone when he heard the front door open.
“I brought some food home, Lisa,” he called.
She came into the kitchen and joined him at the table. He slid her food across to her. “Thanks,” she said.
He watched her for a moment then turned to clean up his plate. There was still tension between them but something seemed to have changed. There was a lighter feeling in the air. Neither one even dared to utter the word, “hope.”
By the time John had gathered up the mess of papers he wanted to bring, Lisa was finished eating and was ready to leave. In the car, John tried to strike up a conversation but kept running out of things to say. They drove most of the way in silence, broken only by an occasional comment about the ignorant drivers on the road or how the stop lights insisted on staying red!
Lisa wasn’t sharing the same hopeful feeling as John. She was glad to be doing something, but she had a hard time believing it would really help. Still, if Rob could point them in the right direction, it was worth a try. She hated to admit it, but John had been right. They could give up or they could try. Things certainly couldn’t get any worse, so they had nothing to lose.
She glanced over at John. He was staring at the road and didn’t seem to notice. He had just been so intolerable lately! He rarely expressed what he was thinking and it was so frustrating, always trying to guess. Where was the funny and smart man she had fallen in love with? But then again, maybe she was being too hard on him. He did have a lot on his mind the past couple of weeks, and this clearly wasn’t easy on him, either.
They arrived at Rob’s company with a bit of nervous anticipation. John parked the car, then they headed into the building and up the elevator.
“John?” Rob smiled as he held out his hand. “Hello, I’m Rob.”
“Nice to meet you,” said John. “And this is my wife Lisa.”
“Hello Lisa,” Rob shook her hand also, “nice to meet you both, why don’t you follow me.”
Rob welcomed them to his office and asked if they’d like something to drink. After pouring two steaming cups of coffee, Rob handed one to each of them. “So, you’re thinking of building a timber framed house?” he inquired.
“Yes” replied John, “but I don’t know if we’ll be able to now.”
“What seems to be the problem?”
“Well, we found some property along a lake that was just perfect…got started on the paperwork, and everything was going great until a few days ago. We found out that we can’t get the loan we needed. It’s been very hard to deal with.”
“Don’t forget about the zoning problem,” Lisa chimed in.
“Yeah, it’s kind of complicated,” finished John. “It has something to do with the property being designated as a ‘wetland.’ We wrote down all the complaints we could think of, like you suggested. It feels more confusing than it did before we started.”
Rob nodded empathetically. “That’s the way it always feels. But I’ve got to tell you guys one thing, don’t expect me to solve your problems, you’re going to do that yourselves.”
“Huh? Sarah said you helped them get their dream home!” blurted John.
“I did help them, but they did the real work,” Rob explained. “They started out just like you, really frustrated and no apparent cause for hope. I simply helped them go through the steps to look at their problems so they could come up with a solution. They just needed a little guidance.”
“I suppose there’s no such thing as a silver bullet,” Lisa mused,” but what is involved with this – do we need to buy software or anything?”
“No, No, nothing really complicated. We thought about making some software to help our customers, but this is totally doable with paper and pencil. It’s based on a formula of Eliyahu Goldratt’s that we’ve adopted and modified.”
“Whose formula?” asked Lisa.
“Eliyahu Goldratt. He’s an author who’s written many business books with a scientific approach. You probably heard the science statement, ‘Truth doesn’t exist, only the best explanation,’ or, ‘There isn’t any truth, only the best theory.’
“As far as how it affects you, you need to learn the 5 Steps. Hang on, I’ve got this listed out…here we go.”
“Is this it?” asked John. “I expected more.”
“Nope! Just the 5 Steps,” replied Rob, “6 if you count going back over the steps to keep improving.”
Lisa looked at the sheet. It read:
Tomorrow… Thumbnail view… please post your opinon thus far!
Mister P
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September 28, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
- ONE LAST HOPE -
John pulled out the business card for ABC Construction and retreated to their second bedroom. It was part office, part storage room and was cluttered with haphazardly stacked boxes. He removed a stack of books from a chair and sat down. He took a deep breath and dialed the number.
“Hello? This is Rob.”
“Hi, sorry to be calling so late, I thought I’d get your answer machine.”
“No problem, you got me on my cell phone. Who is this?”
“My name’s John Smith. I don’t know if you remember Sarah Kirkpatrick?” John didn’t wait for an answer but continued headlong. “Anyway she told me about her problems and told me you had helped them. My wife and I are planning to build a timber framed house but were having some problems with the bank.”
“Oh, yes, I remember Sarah,” Rob replied. “We built them a nice house last year. They had a few major hurdles to clear but they figured out a plan and it went great. Would you like to get together sometime to see how they solved their problems?”
“Sounds great,” John answered. “When could we meet?”
“How does next Tuesday about 3:00 sound?”
John felt a sense of urgency, “Could we meet any sooner?”
They agreed to meet at Rob’s office the next day at 3:30. John put down the phone, went back into the living room and sat across from Lisa.
“Hey, guess what?” he asked, but didn’t wait for an answer. “I scheduled a meeting with a builder tomorrow. I want you to come too.”
Lisa looked at him. “What do you mean?” she asked. “What’s the point?”
John filled Lisa in on his conversation with Sarah then added, “I thought we could explain our situation and see what he has to say. It can’t hurt anything.”
“Well, I suppose not. You already screwed up the loan and we’re dead in the water.”
“Oh, that’s right, this is all my fault – again! You know I get enough of that from your mother, I don’t need it coming from my wife, too!”
“Well, maybe if you made enough money that we weren’t stuck in this crummy apartment, we wouldn’t have a reason to blame you.”
“How can anyone make enough money the way you spend? You are the one who screwed up all of our credit cards and I’m the one who’s been paying for it. My car’s ready to fall apart, but I can’t afford to get a new one because of you!
“What are you doing?” Lisa asked, as John began writing on a small sticky note pad.
“I’m writing all of this down.”
“For what?” she asked defensively.
“I just talked to Rob on the phone. One of the things he told me was to write down all our complaints about our current situation. It’s the first step in the Master Method. He said the first step is to write each complaint on a different sticky note. He said he’d explain more when we meet with him tomorrow.
“I have a husband that I have no respect for. How’s that for a complaint?” she said bitterly.
“Well if that’s a real complaint instead of you just trying to be nasty, fine! I’ll write it down and add it to the pile. Rob says the first step is to identify all of our complaints and things we don’t like about our situation. We write down everything. We’ll decide what’s relevant later on.
“Great, then you can add to that list the fact that all of our money is tied up in a piece of land that we can’t build on thanks to some stupid zoning problem!
“I’ll write that down as two complaints. Money tied up, and zoning problems.”
“You’re serious about this. You’re really writing all that stuff down?”
“The way I see it, we can give up and cry about it, or we can look for other options. I’m not ready to roll over and play dead just yet.”
“What time are we meeting this guy tomorrow?’
“3:30. I’ll pick you up at three, that’ll give us plenty of time to get to his office.”
“OK. I’ll be ready.”
As she walked away, John thought he noticed something new in Lisa’s eyes. Something he had never seen before. He had actually started taking charge, and he could barely hope to think that he had actually seen a small look of respect.
Your opinion matters! Please comment.
Got the bone in my teeth…
Mister P
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September 26, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
- A LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL -
For John, work seemed to drag today. Shutting down his computer, he grabbed his coat and briefcase and strode out of the office. In the lobby he bumped into Sarah. He and Sarah had been hired at the firm at around the same time, but they had been classmates in college before then and knew each other well.
“Hey John,” Sarah said in a chirpy tone.
He had no choice but to reply, “Hi Sarah.”
“Well, you sound gloomy! What’s up?” she asked.
The last thing John wanted to do was talk about the situation, but he felt trapped. “It’s the house, Sarah. It’s just not working out.”
Her face became grim, “Oh no, that’s too bad. I’m so sorry,” she said, concerned.
“Yeah, and everything’s just dragging me down. It feels rather hopeless. Lisa’s been distant lately and this sure isn’t helping any.”
“I can certainly understand that. You know, Arthur and I were in a similar situation when we built our house last year.”
“You were?” John had been to their new home and remembered when they had built it. “I never heard you had any problems with it.”
“Well, it was pretty bad. We had already begun building when the company Arthur worked for made some cuts, and Arthur got laid off. Suddenly the house was over our budget. He found a job soon after, but he took quite a cut in pay. We realized we weren’t going to be able to afford the house. We had no idea what to do!”
John nodded. “I think I know how you felt,” he said sadly.
Sarah continued, “We knew we had to tell the builder and we didn’t know how he’d react. We figured we’d have to cancel the whole job until we could save enough to finish. Our contracting company was ABC Construction. We met with Rob, the owner, and explained the situation.
“It was just awful. I couldn’t stop crying. Arthur and I felt terrible. But you know what? Rob wasn’t even worried and didn’t judge us at all. He said something like, ‘Problems arise but you just have to keep them under control.’ He asked us if there was a way to continue the house and finish it, would we do it?
“Of course we said YES! But we had no idea how we could do that. Then he explained a method that he uses in his own company, called the Master Method. We worked together with Rob and made a lot of changes. In the end, the house was finished and it turned out better than we could have hoped! We learned a lot and since then, things have been going great!”
John was stunned. “Wow, I had no idea.”
“Everything went so smoothly after that, I guess we had no reason to tell anyone how bad it looked for a while. And at the time, it was very hard to talk about. But if you’re going through the same thing, you need to know there’s hope. There are always options.”
A glimmer of hope flickered in John. “So what is the Master Method?”
Sarah smiled and dug around in her purse for a moment, then handed him a business card.
“Call Rob yourself and ask him. Tell him I told you to call about the ‘Master Method.’”
“You always carry these around with you?”
“Sure. Never know when you might need to help an old friend,” she said with a wink. “Let me know how it goes. Have a good evening, John.”
“You too Sarah, thanks.”
John slid the card into his coat pocket. On the ride home he thought about what Sarah had told him. Could Rob help them too? All they wanted was to build a home!
He was home in time to eat with Lisa for once. They didn’t talk much over dinner but he wasn’t feeling as disheartened anymore, either. He wondered if she had talked with her mother today and told her about the house. He could imagine what that conversation must have been like. But he didn’t care, it didn’t matter. He was beginning to feel hopeful and wasn’t going to ruin it by getting into an argument with Lisa.
Please tell me What You Think!
Mister P
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September 25, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
- A FEELING OF DESPAIR -
John arrived home after 8:00 that evening. He’d stayed late at work, then visited the property for as long as possible, dreading the return home with this kind of news, but he couldn’t put it off any longer. He and Lisa had lived in this crummy apartment complex since they were first married. Now he wondered if they would ever escape this place.
He walked in, hung up his coat and called, “Lisa?” He walked down the narrow hall past the kitchen into the living room, where saw her curled up on the couch, reading a book.
“Hey Hon, your dinner’s in the refrigerator,” she said distractedly. “Where have you been?”
“Been kinda stressed, so I went to the property. Sorry I’m late,” John mumbled.
As John’s dinner was heating, Lisa came into the kitchen. “My mom’s coming with us to the property tomorrow,” she informed him.
A blast of cold shot up John’s spine. OK, this was it, the moment of truth. “Look, honey, about the home loan, I have some bad news,” he said.
“What do you mean?”
“We weren’t approved.” He couldn’t stand to look at her, so he stared down at the table.
“What do you mean we weren’t approved?” Lisa asked, bewildered.
“The bank denied our loan.”
He tried desperately to keep his voice calm. She didn’t say a word so he continued, “It must be because of the bad credit we had. But that’s not all, the building permit was denied, turns out that parcel is zoned as a wetland! It’s as if the entire project is jinxed!” His voice trembled slightly.
“Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” Lisa’s voice was rising. “I was so excited for mom to come see the land! Now what do I tell her?” Lisa was angry. “She’s been disappointed in me ever since I married you.”
“Hey, I didn’t know you were going to invite your mother! You never tell me what’s going on. I just found out this afternoon and I’ve been sick about it all day.”
The last thing John needed to be reminded of now was his mother-in-law’s disapproval. She had disapproved of him from the very beginning and she let everyone know it.
“I wasn’t the one who ruined our credit!” he continued, his voice steadily rising despite his efforts to remain calm. “And if you think I care what your mother thinks, you’re wrong!”
“I just want her to be happy with me! She was so pleased that we were finally getting a house and I…I…” Lisa burst into tears.
John turned and left the kitchen. His appetite was gone and all he wanted now was to get away from Lisa. She ruined their credit with her reckless spending yet her mom still wanted to blame him for everything. It was too much to bear at the moment. He retreated to the bedroom and lay down on the bed.
He laid there, his mind racing. He was suddenly thinking about his own parents, how they had wanted him to get a master’s degree, get his career in order – the career his Dad wanted for him, anyway – have a nice home and get married. Did Lisa’s mother have a point? Ever since they’d been married a year ago he’d been struggling to make ends meet. But he had saved enough money to buy a nice parcel of land near the lake and he had been putting all his efforts into obtaining their dream home. He finally drifted off into a troubled sleep.
When he awoke, Lisa was not in bed. Passing the living room, he saw her asleep in the rocking chair with a book in her lap. Their relationship had been deteriorating. At first he thought it was a phase that would pass, but it seemed a lot more serious now. They had both been so excited about building a home of their own and he thought they were pulling together. Lisa was making all kinds of plans for the decorations, how to lay out the kitchen, etc. Now everything seemed to go up in smoke, and their relationship with it.
John let the scalding water from the shower fall upon his face. Why did everything have to be so difficult? Why couldn’t some things just go smoothly? Was he not trying hard enough? At least Lisa’s parents talked to her. He couldn’t remember the last time he had spoken with his parents. What was wrong with him?
He had a good education and a good job working at an engineering firm, designing bridges. It was a challenging and fulfilling job but his days at work seemed to drag. He didn’t converse much with others. He couldn’t stay focused on his work. At noon each day he could hear his coworkers laughing and talking. How could they be so happy? Life was one big disappointment after another. He avoided starting a conversation with anyone and ate lunch alone in his cubicle most of the time.
Sighing, John shut off the shower and got ready for work.
Lisa sat in the rocking chair watching John’s car leave the driveway. She wondered what would happen now. Why didn’t he try harder? Surely with a little more effort, something could have been done to get the loan to go through! Maybe she should have been the one taking care of it all. Maybe he didn’t have much motivation after all.
Please leave your comment!
Mister P… Perseverance…Passion…Patience…etc
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September 23, 2009 | Posted by Mister P
The elusive dream -part I
How to find solutions in the midst of conflicting desires
In this story John stumbles across a problem solving method which him and his wife Lisa, use to expose the core problem, visualize a clear goal, indentify roadblocks or things which could prevent them from reaching their goal, and get a step by step roadmap to overcome obstacles by using logical problem solving.
What does this mean for YOU?
You get a process you can use to:
- Organize and understand the chaos in your business, life, relationship, etc.
- Expose the weak link (the root of your problems)
- Clearly visualize your goal
- Predict what might prevent you from reaching your goal
- Produce simple, logical solutions which will help you reach your goal
The story line is fraught with emotional conflict as John and Lisa pursue their dream of acquiring a timber framed home.
Therefore, the example of the Master Method in action, really delves into the relationship of John and Lisa.
We all learn and remember best when we hear stories. Stories allow for instant osmosis, we can visualize ourselves enacting the same principles in our own lives. That way you will appreciate learning the Master Method from a story format.
You will also want to get hold of the DVD which accompanies this story to really make the Master Method work for you.
As you read about this couples journey of turmoil and joy, visualize using these steps for yourself.
Good Luck.
Mister P
The elusive Dream -Part II
How to find solutions in the midst of conflicting desires
- THE NEWS -
The sun was setting low in the sky and the soft sounds of evening were coming to life. The crickets and frogs were singing their lullaby and the wind was humming through the leaves.
John Smith watched as the last rays disappeared on the horizon, a crestfallen look on his face. Even the ordinarily refreshing smooth surface of the lake seemed a dismal dark sight, and the songs of the evening offered no relief. He sighed loudly, his thoughts recapturing the events of the afternoon.
It was a bad day at the office, but that’s how they’d all been lately anyway. He had been discussing a recent contract with a coworker when the phone in his cubicle rang its default ring tone like it had for years (he had never bothered changing it). Excusing himself, he ducked into his office and picked up the receiver.
“Good evening, sir. Am I speaking with John Smith?” asked the caller.
“This is John.”
“Hell, Mr. Smith, this is Clyde at BankCo and I’m calling regarding the loan.”
“Oh, finally!” exclaimed John, with a feeling of excitement. “I’ve been trying to reach you to find out how soon I’ll be cleared to build.”
After a slight hesitation, John heard, “Sir, unfortunately the loan has been denied.”
“What?” A feeling of panic ran through John, like an electrical shock. “Wait! That’s ridiculous!”
“I am sorry, sir but you did not meet the requirements for the loan you applied for.”
“This is absurd!” exclaimed John.
“I’m sorry sir, there’s nothing more I can do.”
There was a click and the voice was gone, leaving John alone to deal with the growing knot in his stomach.
To be continued tomorrow…
Please leave your unvarnished comments!
Mister P
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